life is but a game of poker

it is pretty insane to think how my life turned over the past weeks. with an Ace and a king on hand i folded and was never included in the game of luck. for a starter, i was just new with this kind of game but sadly i'm losing. the term 'beginners luck' wasn't true to me.

last week was stress week and so far, i was not able to recover from such hellish and traumatic. exams were a bit rush and turnouts were not really as what i've expected. i had really bad grades like b's and c's and i really am not prepared for such. i haven't figured why it came to such a tremendous loss but i blame it to that thesis as it distracted me from doing my readings and studying. it was really one hell of a week. to add on that, i have never seen my crush last week (and by crush i meant crush). i dont know if it was really conflicting schedules that caused it but im quite sure that fate isnt pro. but to every trouble comes reconnection. i had his number and we had a short chat yesterday. so far so good until today. i already have his number but i am really a coward! i dont know what to text him!

but one thing i am afraid is losing him. losing my crush without even having to get to know him. this is my last year in my university and my last few months of seeing him. im a bit nostalgic of the parting part and a bit ecstatic of what to expect. i know that we will move our separate ways. going forward to a life full of uncertainties and trials and God-knows what. i might go west and he might do his outreaches with the people of Tibet or the Himalayas. But one thing is certain, he is my crush!

life is but a game of poker. very unexpected, very heart-pounding, very poker-ish!